jokesradar.com
Humour (Commonwealth English) or humor (American English) is the tendency of experiences to provoke laughter and provide amusement. The term derives from the humoral medicine of the ancient Greeks, which taught that the balance of fluids in the human body, known as humours (Latin: humor, “body fluid”), controlled human health and emotion.
People of all ages and cultures respond to humour. Most people are able to experience humour—be amused, smile or laugh at something funny (such as a pun or joke)—and thus are considered to have a sense of humour. The hypothetical person lacking a sense of humour would likely find the behaviour to be inexplicable, strange, or even irrational. Though ultimately decided by subjective personal taste, the extent to which a person finds something humorous depends on a host of variables, including geographical location, culture, maturity, level of education, intelligence and context. For example, young children may favour slapstick such as Punch and Judy puppet shows or cartoons such as Tom and Jerry or Looney Tunes, whose physical nature makes it accessible to them. By contrast, more sophisticated forms of humour such as satire require an understanding of its social meaning and context, and thus tend to appeal to a more mature audience.
LET’S START
“Made a precautionary shot into the air… from a mortar.”
“Culture ends where the toilet flush doesn’t work.”
“Dude! Remember! Silence from a woman is not a sign of agreement; it’s a harbinger of trouble.”
“All mothers-in-law are brilliant because they confess posthumously…”
“Well, what have you achieved by the age of 25?!”
I didn’t create an Instagram account.
“The termite invasion in Thailand destroyed two villages and fed three.”
“When a man was asked by his wife, “When will they have sex?” it was a bad idea to specify “With whom?””
“Dear! You can’t always deny everything!”
“No, I can’t …”
“My child is like its mother… Screams loudly…”
“Things are very strange here… I think I’ll stay!”
“Nothing reveals the deep inner world like a selfie with a neckline.”
“Free training in eating free cheese! “
Business course “Mouse Trap”!
“Loneliness is when you always know WHO messed things up.”
“A woman gave birth to six at once. Now that’s what I call a cat-woman…”
“Existence defines consciousness, and drinking turns it off…”
“The visibility of the law must be observed, especially when it is violated.”
“Sex is what allows men to relax while stressing out.”
“There’s nothing heavier than hauling boxes of someone else’s beer.”
The boss enters the office:
“Today we work until three!”
“Hooray!”
“Morning.”
“If everything in a woman should be perfect, there’s no need to insert something into her.”
“Can a person be wise if their wisdom teeth have been removed?”
“One blonde got scared that thoughts are material and completely stopped thinking.”
“For the second week, I’ve been trying to understand: Does life exist after paying for utilities?”
“A good boy does everything the same as a bad one, only worse.”
“If you drink antifreeze with alcohol, you won’t go blind!”
“I want to live in such a way that I can cure all my teeth…”
“Better 1 time with Snow White than 7 times with dwarves!”
It’s hard to keep your word of honor, especially if it’s swearing.
A happy old age is when you realize that all your enemies have already died.
If you cannot become a speaking example, become a silent reproach.
Constantly haunted by a vile feeling of over fulfilled duty.
Don’t disturb the bikini area without any special reason .
“My salary is excellent.
The prices in stores are somehow inappropriate for it.”
“How to know the inner world of a person?”
“Using an enema.”
There are people you can only reach by slamming the door…
Women’s cunning is an augmented reality for the male mind.
“Do animals think?”
“I don’t know, but they think better than humans.”
I wish all this crap would end so that another one could begin.
For those who prefer solitude, it is enough to arrive everywhere on time.
Phone sex is like traveling through TV.
“It is impossible for a donkey to prove that he is an ass. Because he’s an ass.”
If you react to everything, you may quickly run out of reagents.
According to etiquette, you need to hold a knife in your right hand and a pistol in your left.
“It’s a shame when I waited for a guy from the army, but he didn’t wait for me from prison!”
“Tim, who will you be for Halloween?”
“A drunk alcoholic!”
“Again?!”
“I’m somewhere in the fourth billion on Forbes magazine’s list.”
“Anyone who buys two gloves will receive a third as a gift.”
“Before you get attached to each other, agree on the length of the leash.”
“It feels like living life is like watching a trailer instead of a movie.”
“Humanity is the main quality of a cannibal…”
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